Friendship Despite Differences

by Ellen Clodfelter

This month our focus is on friends as we strive to live like Jesus. The Bible gives us many different examples of close friends: Naomi and Ruth, Jesus and Peter, Paul and Timothy, Elijah and Elisha.  

One of the best examples of friendship in the Bible is David and Jonathan. They made a covenant to be loyal to each other and their descendants. David and Jonathan couldn’t have been more different, yet they had a very close friendship.  

While Jonathan was the oldest son of a king, David was the youngest son of a shepherd. Jonathan had his own armor; David had a sling. Jonathan grew up in a palace; David grew up in the fields of a small town. Jonathan was a trained soldier; David was a young shepherd boy and musician. Jonathan was the leader of soldiers; David was the conqueror of Goliath. Jonathan was the prince; David was the hero. Jonathan was the rightful heir to the throne; David was anointed as the next king of Israel. Even Jonathan’s father, King Saul, hated David and wanted to kill him. With all their differences, Jonathan should have hated David. He should have felt jealous and threatened, it should have made them enemies.  

But that is not how Jonathan felt. He made a covenant with David because of their friendship. The covenant that Jonathan made was one of friendship, loyalty and protection. Jonathan knew that David had God’s favor and even gave his own royal robe, tunic, sword, bow and belt. Jonathan protected and warned David every time his father tried to kill him.  

I don’t think Jonathan gets enough credit for this friendship. Time and time again he gets the short end of the deal. What was rightfully his is being taken away. David is getting all the credit. David is known as a man after God’s own heart. But Jonathan stepped aside from what was rightfully his to make God’s will happen. He totally could have done what his father did. He could have hated David and wanted to kill him. But instead, Jonathan knew that David would be the next King and decided to protect him.  

David is a hero in the Bible and rightfully so, but let’s take a look into the Godly character of Jonathan for a minute. Jonathan had forgiveness, love, compassion, humility, loyalty, integrity, and selflessness. He could have been like his dad, trying to get revenge for what was rightfully his, but he decided to listen to God. I would have to say that David wasn’t the only man after God’s own heart in this scenario.  

What a wonderful thing it is to have a friend like Jonathan, one that sticks with you through thick or thin. This makes me ask the question, “what kind of friend am I?” Am I like Jonathan, or am I a friend that is based on convenience? What can this person do for me? Am I a friend that is unreliable, critical or selfish? If I want a friend that is like Jonathan, I need to be a friend more like him.  

I have a friend that is even better than Jonathan. I have Jesus. We couldn’t be more different; He is the creator, I am the created. He is perfect, I am flawed. He is God, I am not. He lived together with people; I want to retreat. Jesus has every right to hate and despise me, but He has chosen to love me.  

In John 15:13 Jesus says, “Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends.” 

This is what Jesus did for us. Not only is he our Lord, Savior, Father, He is our best friend. Jesus designed friendship to be this way. We cannot live life alone. We also need to live this way and show Jesus’ love to those around us. We need to live in relationships like Jesus.  

In what ways do you need to be a different type of friend so that you are living like Jesus?